Dad has been agitated lately. I caught him talking to himself a couple of times and I'm sure I heard a fight between him and Mom last night. I don't know what's going on but I thought, maybe he'd like to play catch with me, maybe physical activity would distract him and help him deal with stress. What a fool I was...
He got very very angry, said no and just to make sure I got the message, he slapped me. Mom came to my room later and I tried to hide the fact that I'd been crying from her but my anger and disappointment got the better of me. I told her everything, between sobs and my voice was shrill when I told her, I wish, I wish he were dead! In an attempt to cheer me up, she offered to take me to the movies to see The Mark of Zorro. Of course I couldn't resist. My excitement dwindled when she informed me Dad would love to come with us, he really wanted to see that movie and he'd been having a difficult time lately. I reluctantly agreed by nodding but I made sure to sulk for a good fifteen minutes. He'll need to do more than take me to the movies and buy me popcorn if he wants to be back in my good graces. Oh yes, I will go so far as asking for ice cream as well! With sprinkles! I'll be ferocious!
When he walked up to me and with a shy expression offered to help me put on my coat, I looked him dead in the eye and said "That's Alfred's job". He looked stunned for a moment and assured me he could do it, helping a kid into his coat is not that hard. I mumbled "You're no Alfred" and I'm fairly certain he heard me. He didn't say anything but he wore a pout for a while. I felt pleased with myself. Mom seemed to notice the tension but tried to lift our spirits with smiles and jokes. I can't say I was completely unaffected but I have my pride to think about.
Dead. They're both dead, my parents. My loving, wonderful parents...
He got very very angry, said no and just to make sure I got the message, he slapped me. Mom came to my room later and I tried to hide the fact that I'd been crying from her but my anger and disappointment got the better of me. I told her everything, between sobs and my voice was shrill when I told her, I wish, I wish he were dead! In an attempt to cheer me up, she offered to take me to the movies to see The Mark of Zorro. Of course I couldn't resist. My excitement dwindled when she informed me Dad would love to come with us, he really wanted to see that movie and he'd been having a difficult time lately. I reluctantly agreed by nodding but I made sure to sulk for a good fifteen minutes. He'll need to do more than take me to the movies and buy me popcorn if he wants to be back in my good graces. Oh yes, I will go so far as asking for ice cream as well! With sprinkles! I'll be ferocious!
When he walked up to me and with a shy expression offered to help me put on my coat, I looked him dead in the eye and said "That's Alfred's job". He looked stunned for a moment and assured me he could do it, helping a kid into his coat is not that hard. I mumbled "You're no Alfred" and I'm fairly certain he heard me. He didn't say anything but he wore a pout for a while. I felt pleased with myself. Mom seemed to notice the tension but tried to lift our spirits with smiles and jokes. I can't say I was completely unaffected but I have my pride to think about.
***
Dead. They're both dead, my parents. My loving, wonderful parents...
We were walking back to our car when we were confronted by a mugger. He wanted Mom's necklace but because it was a gift from Dad she wouldn't let him have it. They struggled. I can't remember exactly what happened, it's all a blur. But Dad managed to punch him once, that much I remember. And then... they were bleeding to death, Mom and Dad, and I couldn't do anything but stare at them. The mugger ran away. Does he feel guilty about what he did to us, to our family? I'll never know.
They were so still, so... absent. By the time I heard the police sirens I knew it was too late.
When Alfred finally picked me up from the police station, I couldn't even find it in my heart to cry. I had wished for my father to die. Be careful what you wish for, they say. I wish I were dead instead of them. I wish I had never spoken those angry words. I wish... I wish it were Dad tucking me in instead of Alfred. I wish I could hear Mom's laughter in the corridor.
"Don't blame yourself, Master Bruce," Alfred said after I'd told him everything about the slap and the fighting. "After all, you're only a little boy. You have no power over death."
Perhaps I'm just being a brat but his words failed to soothe me.
***
Today was an odd day. I was taking a stroll and thinking about my parents when I realised the sun had set and I was lost. Just when I thought the day couldn't get any worse, I slipped and fell into a cave. I hurt my leg pretty bad and I was dizzy for a while. The only thing I could do was lie on my back and look at the small part of the sky which was visible through the hole I'd just fallen. Seeing as it was very dark and I needed to keep my mind occupied, I wondered how long it would take for Alfred to find me. It wasn't long before I heard a strange noise, unlike anything I'd heard before. It started as a low rumble and then it became louder and louder and suddenly, I was absorbed into a dark, shrieking cloud!
I could tell small claws were grazing my face, my hands, that I used to cover my head. I could feel each scratch leave a blazing trail on my skin. It was bats, I realised in my panic. Bats, out for blood, flying all around me and I would surely die in that hole. I tried to look at the sky again but there were so many of them, so many... I closed my eyes and waited for death. But soon, the noise faded and I could breathe again, even if my breath came out frantic. Hesitantly, I opened my eyes. There wasn't a bat in sight.
"Master Bruce!" I heard Alfred shout shortly after. His voice wasn't coming from too far away. I gathered all my strength and screamed, thankful that I had Alfred to count on.
After I was bandaged and safely tucked into bed, Alfred informed me those bats weren't in fact out for blood, especially not my own. Common fruit bats, he said. "Oh well, perhaps I should have offered them grapes then!" I said and then pretended I'd fallen asleep. Common fruit bats... Ugh, whatever.
After I was bandaged and safely tucked into bed, Alfred informed me those bats weren't in fact out for blood, especially not my own. Common fruit bats, he said. "Oh well, perhaps I should have offered them grapes then!" I said and then pretended I'd fallen asleep. Common fruit bats... Ugh, whatever.
***
Alfred warned me my shenanigans are becoming not only boring but irritating as well. He said he may not be my father but he'll ground me if he has to. I don't understand what the fuss is about. All I did was make a cape out of some old black sheets and I wear it, running around the mansion, whispering "I am the night, I am the night". Why would that ever be irritating? I am trying to conquer my fear here, Alfred! What's wrong with that, Alfred? Let's see how boring he'll think I am if I hide behind the bushes and jump out when he walks past. That'll teach him to mess with the night!
***
Alfred wasn't impressed.
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