Sunday, June 30, 2013

Homo Sapiens, my sweet bottom!

(I don't even know how to begin...)

Ok, speech is important, we've mastered that. Opposable thumbs and walking on two legs? Check! Wearing clothes and not living in trees? Check! Buying useless things so we can rub our wealth in our neighbour's face? Check! Not throwing feces at each other during an argument? Check! We consider our species to be intelligent. So much so, that we've crowned ourselves kings, rulers of all other living beings, superior. We are, in fact, not.


Some people think that believing we are descended from apes is outrageous. I've read a bunch of things about apes, watched a couple of documentaries. Let me tell you, guys, I wish those were my ancestors. Boy, do they have their shit figured out! They may not care about the latest fashion trends and they may not say "good morning" to each other over a cup of coffee, but they are wise and we could learn a thing or two from them.

Because humans do this



And apes do this



Which is to say, they do not discriminate and they DO NOT treat a natural thing as a crime that should be punished. 

"But oh, we humans know better! We are so smart! Stupid animals! Why, if we could have our way, we would be converting them to Christianity and Holy Straightness right now!" Do you know what Bonobos have to say to that? Penis-fencing. Look it up. [Or I can tell you, it's no big deal. Two (Bonobo) males hang face to face from a branch while rubbing their erect penises together. That's right. Homosexual apes are creative. See? You learn things here. Come again, if you want to increase your knowledge!]

The way I talk about people, you probably think I hate them (-us, I'm not an alien). I don't. The truth is, living in this world is very hard for me because I love every single person on this planet and every-single-fucking-day, they find new ways of disappointing me. I'm not being Mother Teresa here. I actually love all of you and seeing (some of) you acting like morons and wasting your potential, hurts me deeply. I don't believe I expect too much of people. I think I am fairly reasonable in my request for evolution. Open your minds, see facts, accept and love each other. It's simple. Apes can do it. Why can't we?

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